Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Wishcasting Wednesday: What Do You Wish To Let Go Of?

It's Wednesday again and I am once again joining in with Jamie Ridler at This week Jamie asks, "What do you wish to let go of?"

As usual, Jamie's prompts are so timely.  Yesterday, I wrote about my fears and insecurities about starting my own handcrafted gifts business.  I have so many fears and insecurities in life, I just wish I could let go of them and just be secure in myself and in my abilities.

It's kind of funny how some of these wishes all fit together.  For me, last weeks wish about being loved and  this weeks wish about letting go, go together.  I think if I could love myself unconditionally, I could let go of my insecurities and my fears.  On the flip side, if I could let go of fears and insecurities, maybe I could love myself unconditionally.

Maybe, if I let go of my fears and insecurities, I would take more chances in general.  I would talk to people more often and maybe make more friends, rather than just a few acquaintances that I have.

My fears and insecurities have always help me back!  It's time to let go and I guess to quote AA, let God, or what one perceives to be God.


Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Creativity and Fear!

I have been thinking more and more about creating things and selling them.  I really love being creative and feel so relaxed and just plain and simply enjoy myself.  I keep putting off the selling piece, mainly because of my fear.  I am always afraid of failing, of people looking at what I make and thinking that there is no way that they would even consider buying anything that i could make because  it is not good enough to sell.  I am afraid people will laugh at me for even considering something like this.  I am trying to get a plan in place to start so that I don't waste my time and money.  Thankfully, I have a ton of supplies so I don't have to dish out a ton of money to start up creating.

I have been trying to come up with a name that will be creative and also say something about me or what I create.  Part of the problem is that there is just so many areas of creativity that I love, I can't decide where to focus what I would make.  Part of me just wants to focus on accessories and small thoughtful gifts, but I don't want to box myself into a specific medium.  That may be a mistake, but maybe not, as long as I make sure that what I create follows some sort of theme, such as accessories and small gifts.

I have been thinking about a name for my "company" for a long time now, and I just can't think of something really creative.  I have tried to think of things in my life that I love.  I have loved rainbows, mythology, and fairies , and dragonflies, and butterflies, and nature.  I love kind of more bohemian style.  I am finding that I love rich, deep, earthy, colors.  I guess I'm just throwing out ideas for me to have them written down so that I can come back and seeing if anything strikes me.

I would love to start with selling my creations, maybe move on to classes and parties, and then when I have time and maybe money get certified as an art therapist.  As is my brain, this post is very haphazard and kind of all over the place.  At this point, I need to write down my thoughts, maybe have others comment on them, and then maybe I can come back and read my thoughts and come up with ideas.


Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Wishcasting Wednesday: What do you wish to make time for?

This is such a loaded question.  Jamie, over at, asks, "What do you wish to make time for?"

There are so many things that I need to make time for.  I need to make time to pursue my dreams, organize my life, spending time with my husband with no one to interrupt us, getting my chores on track (especially laundry), time for exercise and meditation, creating, etc.  Part of me thinks that there is just not enough time for all the things that I want to do, but then there is another part of me that says I just need to lower my expectations and make time, even if it is just a small amount of time.  Sometimes I think that I expect everything to be perfect and then I don't do anything, because I know it won't be perfect.  Sometimes I think I sabotage myself with my expectations.

I wish to make time for all the things that I want/need out of life, just with lowered expectations.  I also wish to make time to figure out who I really am and what I really want out of life (which is pretty obscure and why I wrote down some of the concrete things that I know I need and want to make time for).


Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Wishcasting Wednesday: How Do You Wish To Be Loved?

It's Wednesday once again and Jamie over at asks, "How Do You Wish To Be Loved?"

This week's question is actually really difficult for me to write about, which probably means I really need to write about it.  I am extremely lucky with love.  I have a great family, both my own and my in-laws.  We have our ups and downs, just like pretty much everyone, but we are always there for each other.  I have a fabulous husband who absolutely loves me unconditionally and I have 3 beautiful children who also love me unconditionally (even though as I sit here and write, my daughter screams because she is at the point of fighting her naps, but truly needs them!).

How do I wish to be loved?  I wish to love myself unconditionally.  I have a feeling that this is something most people struggle with, but it is something I really need to work on.  What more can I say about this except that I have to try to remember to be good to myself and not be so critical about myself!

I wish to love me!


I am sure that I could be more descriptive with this post, but I am not sure that i am really ready to write about everything.  I just really need to stop being critical about myself, be happy with who I am, and truly love me!

Making Time!

I'm still trying to figure out what window opened after I lost my job.  Granted it was only a part time job, but it brought in enough money to make life a little easier.  Now, we don't have that extra income, but I am home for dinner and hopefully to make life a little easier from a functional stand point.  I am trying to ask the universe to wither give me another opportunity that is the same time wise, or to give me a knew opportunity to take advantage of this break in work.

I am trying to make time to be creative.  I am hoping that I can make some Christmas gifts, and that in the process, I can hone my skills so that I can maybe sell things.  I keep thinking about what my dreams and passions are, and how I can make them a reality.  Do I really want to create and sell?  Do I want to just hold classes and teach crafts?  If that is the case, I really have to hone my skills and learn how to teach.  I would also have to learn how to market myself.  I think in reality, I would love to teach classes, or have something more like open studio time or simple craft parties where people get together and create while spending some quality time with each other and/or learning how to use creativity for stress relief.

In either case, I really need to make time to create.  I need to create for my own sanity and stress relief.  I need to create to hone my skills and really be sure that what I do is worth giving as a gift and worth selling.  I need to create to actually make things to sell.  I really need to spend some time getting creative!

The other thing that I really need to make time for is my health.  I have been really bad with my diet.  Have I spent time eating the way I should?  No!  Have I really taken the time to eat healthy?  Some what but not really where I should be.  Have I spent time planning out our meals so that I know what we are eating, so I know we are eating healthy, so I am spending money wisely?  I have been better, but not as good as I should be!  I really need to plan my meals and really work on making food that is enjoyable to eat, healthy, and cost effective!  I really want to learn more about herbs and essential oils and how to make beauty products that will help me and not cause problems due to different additives.

All of this means that I really need to prioritize my time so that I can hopefully take advantage of any window that opens (as well as taking care of my responsibilities), now that the door has shut!


Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Wishcasting Wednesday: What do you wish to do one day?

Joining in again for Wishcasting Wednesday!  This week, over at, Jamie asks "What do you wish to do one day?"

As usual, Jamie asks things that I am usually thinking about.  This weeks question is pretty pertinent in my life right now.  Last Wednesday, I went to work only to find out that I got laid off.  This is the first time anything like this has ever happened to me in the 20 years since I have been out of high school.  I am a social worker and really believed that I was safe from cuts like this.

Even though this was only a part time job, it made a huge difference to my family.  I am trying to think of things in a more positive light!  I am able to get to be home for dinner with my family.  I am able to not have to feel rushed getting things ready for when my husband comes home.  I am able to get unemployment so I can actually have some income coming in to help with our finances!

The other positive thing that I am trying to think about truly relates to this week's prompt.  I am trying  to decide just what it is that I really want to do with my life!  I have a great husband and three great kids, but what do I want to do with my professional life?  How can I use my education in a more out of the box way?  I am thinking that I really do want to do something with art therapy, or even do something less clinical, but still something related to art/creating and how it can be therapeutic.  I've written about this before, and I still think that this is something that I really want to do one day. I would love to be part of a community that truly believes in the mind/body/spirit, not just one area.  I think that my social work career and my love of creating can be mixed to truly help care for ones mind, body and spirit.  I would love to be my own boss one day and again be part of a community that truly looks at the whole person, not just parts of a person!  Oh, and I want to learn to use herbs and aroma therapy as part of my career too!  I think herbs, essential oils and creativity can all work together to help someone have a more balanced life!

What do you wish to do one day?

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

What To Do Next?

Last Wednesday, I was a told that my part time position of 15 hours had been cut from the budget. Needless to say, it feels very strange not to go to work. It's also a little disconcerting not to have an income coming in. I will be applying for unemployment, the first time ever, but it still feels weird. I posted on Facebook that I was laid off and one of my friends mentioned asking the universe for the same set up "ask and you shall receive". I honestly thought about that before she even commented about it. The other thing I thought about in the same vein is, maybe I should thing about doing something more creative. Maybe my unemployment checks will help to feed my family while I start working on a more creative endeavor than social work. The other ironic thing with regards to this is another Facebook comment from my husband's cousin. I have made a few new bags and am really enjoying sewing and posted a picture of a cute quick envelope clutch that I made for my husband's reunion. The comment was that I should make more and sell them. Maybe that is the next step I should be taking. Could the lay off be a blessing in disguise?

I have been wanting to open an etsy shop for a while. A bunch of friends either have one or have recently opened one. Is this the time now for me? I am so scared that it will fail, but what if it doesn't? What if I can find a good niche to get into? I have been wondering if a good niche would be the fusion of recycle/up-cycled and natural materials with new synthetic materials. First it would go with the whole trying to be green in my life, then using recycled materials would hopefully be cost effective, and given the whole push for others to go green, just maybe this would be a decent niche. It would also be the fusion of old and new. Should I look at another areanof creativity? Is this crazy on my part?

I am reall seriously considering doing this as well as doing craft fairs. I would love to have a partner in all of this, but I'm not sure who. Maybe having a partner is a bad idea. I guess I really need to make a decision and just go for it if I decide that I really want to do this! So as my Facebook friend said "just put it out to the universe, ask and you will receive!"

I am asking "should I use this time to try to follow one of my dreams and see if I can help to provide for my family using my creativity?"