It's Wednesday once again and once again, Jamie Ridler at http://www.jamieridlerstudios.ca asks, "What Do You Wish To Rise Above?"
I thought about this and read other's posts, all of whom wrote great posts on this topic, and decided that I wish to rise above my insecurities! When I think about all the different things that are going on in my life, have gone on in my life, and will be going on in my life, I think about how i am often held back by my insecurities, my fear of failure. If there is one thing that I really need to work on, it's my insecurities. I know I don't think I'm good enough at a lot of different things and am only ok at somethings. I need to give myself permission to fail. Without some failure, you don't learn. Failure doesn't have to be bad/negative!
I also think that my insecurities fuel some of my other issues. I can be really judgmental of others, especially if I have found myself in a similar situation. I need to let it go and have a little more empathy (which is really important since my career is in social work and empathy is huge). I need to let go of my past failures and not let the green eyed monster get me! I need to let go of my fear of being wrong and trust my instincts, for example having my older son tested for developmental delays. I am finally getting him tested and I am ok with what ever outcome we get. Of course, this would be one area that I would be happy to be wrong, but I don't want people to think that I am one of those mothers that always thinks that there is something wrong.
My insecurities can certainly hold me back. I am hopeful that if I can let go of my insecurities, I can maybe find more friends, trust myself, and be a little happier (especially given how great my life is). I am very thankful for my husband, my kids, my house, the fact that I can stay at home with my kids and be there for them. I have to remember to be aware of all the good things that I have and let go of those insecurities!
Amy
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Thursday, March 15, 2012
On Being Previvor
If you didn't know, I recently found out that I am a "previvor". A previvor is a term, I believe, that was founded by force.com to designate a term for people who are positive for the BRCA gene. I now am faced with the decision to have prophylactic surgeries to remove my ovaries and my breasts. This has been something that I have thought about for the last couple of months. I had started thinking about it before I got tested, but the reality of this is just finally hitting me. Last night was really the first time that I allowed myself to break down. I was out doing my walk/run and in the middle of it, I broke down and started crying. I started talking to my husband about what happened and he said I really need to do research and figure out what I need to do for me and that he will support me in what ever decision I make.
If you couldn't tell by the name of this blog, I believe in living a more natural life, but I also believe that there is a balance that needs to happen when living a natural life. This decision is one area that I believe needs to be balanced. I don't think that it is an easy decision to make: to either have surgery to remove parts of my body, that for a lot of women including me, are part of who we are as women or to use more alternative means to prevent cancer, breast and ovarian. Right now I am leaning to not doing surgery with the potential of maybe having my ovaries out, but not having my breasts removed. I have felt that this was going to be the way that I would go from the beginning, but I am scared of making the wrong decision and getting cancer and leaving my husband and 3 young children before it is time all because I made the wrong decision.
The New Year's goals that I have written about are based a lot on my BRCA2 + status. I think that if I can work harder on these goals and actually meet them or at least continue working on them, I have a good chance of preventing cancer. There is a lot of writing out there about having a gene and getting cancer. There is also some information on how your genes are not your destiny. I am hoping that I can make changes to my life to help change my genetic destiny. I need to do a ton of research, and I need to find people who are on the same page as I am. I haven't really figured out how to find these people, but I am hoping that there may be a group that I can find, maybe a support group type forum that actually meets in person. I love that the internet allows for all sorts of info, but I really want to meet people and talk to professionals in person.
I am hoping that at some point in my life, I will figure out what I want to do professionally and hope that the less stress I have career wise will help with less stress overall. I would love to have a career that took into account my beliefs of living a handmade and natural life.
Wish me luck on my research endeavors!
Amy
If you couldn't tell by the name of this blog, I believe in living a more natural life, but I also believe that there is a balance that needs to happen when living a natural life. This decision is one area that I believe needs to be balanced. I don't think that it is an easy decision to make: to either have surgery to remove parts of my body, that for a lot of women including me, are part of who we are as women or to use more alternative means to prevent cancer, breast and ovarian. Right now I am leaning to not doing surgery with the potential of maybe having my ovaries out, but not having my breasts removed. I have felt that this was going to be the way that I would go from the beginning, but I am scared of making the wrong decision and getting cancer and leaving my husband and 3 young children before it is time all because I made the wrong decision.
The New Year's goals that I have written about are based a lot on my BRCA2 + status. I think that if I can work harder on these goals and actually meet them or at least continue working on them, I have a good chance of preventing cancer. There is a lot of writing out there about having a gene and getting cancer. There is also some information on how your genes are not your destiny. I am hoping that I can make changes to my life to help change my genetic destiny. I need to do a ton of research, and I need to find people who are on the same page as I am. I haven't really figured out how to find these people, but I am hoping that there may be a group that I can find, maybe a support group type forum that actually meets in person. I love that the internet allows for all sorts of info, but I really want to meet people and talk to professionals in person.
I am hoping that at some point in my life, I will figure out what I want to do professionally and hope that the less stress I have career wise will help with less stress overall. I would love to have a career that took into account my beliefs of living a handmade and natural life.
Wish me luck on my research endeavors!
Amy
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Wishcasting Wednesday: What Do You Wish For Your Future?
It's Wednesday once again and I am joining in with Jamie at http://www.jamieridlerstudios.ca. This week Jamie asks: "Wishcasting Wednesday: What Do You Wish For Your Future?"
This is kind of an easy answer for me. I wish to be doing what I love. Right now I am a stay at home mom. I love it, but in a few short years I need to return to work. Right before I got pregnant with my oldest son, I had just graduated from grad school and got married. Now, almost 5 years later, I am trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. I love being a social worker, but I don't want to be a traditional social worker. I want to use my experience and my education to do something a little less traditional. I have lots of thoughts, but I can't seem to figure out exactly what would make me the happiest. I wish that over the next few years, I can figure out my career, how to fit it into my family life, and how to make sure that me and my family are living a happy healthy life and how I can make sure that I am following my dreams and being true to myself and my beliefs!
For my future; I wish that I can live a life that is true to me and my beliefs and makes me and my family happy!
What do you wish for the future?
Amy
This is kind of an easy answer for me. I wish to be doing what I love. Right now I am a stay at home mom. I love it, but in a few short years I need to return to work. Right before I got pregnant with my oldest son, I had just graduated from grad school and got married. Now, almost 5 years later, I am trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. I love being a social worker, but I don't want to be a traditional social worker. I want to use my experience and my education to do something a little less traditional. I have lots of thoughts, but I can't seem to figure out exactly what would make me the happiest. I wish that over the next few years, I can figure out my career, how to fit it into my family life, and how to make sure that me and my family are living a happy healthy life and how I can make sure that I am following my dreams and being true to myself and my beliefs!
For my future; I wish that I can live a life that is true to me and my beliefs and makes me and my family happy!
What do you wish for the future?
Amy
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Wishcasting Wednesday: What is Your Spirit Wishing For?
It's Wednesday once again and once again I am joining in with Jamie at http://www.jamieridlerstudios.ca for wish casting Wednesday. This week Jamie asks: "What is Your Spirit Wishing For?"
The simple answer is follow through. I set all these goals and a lot of times, I seem to only maintain the goal or even working towards the goal for a short time. I think my spirit needs me to set attainable goals, give myself credit for what I do accomplish, and to follow through with the goals that I set for myself. I think, for me, by not following through, I am not being true to myself. I also think that I don't follow through due to fear. Unfortunately, there are probably a lot of things that my spirit is wishing for, but I think right now, follow through is a good wish to have.
What is your spirit wishing for?
Amy
The simple answer is follow through. I set all these goals and a lot of times, I seem to only maintain the goal or even working towards the goal for a short time. I think my spirit needs me to set attainable goals, give myself credit for what I do accomplish, and to follow through with the goals that I set for myself. I think, for me, by not following through, I am not being true to myself. I also think that I don't follow through due to fear. Unfortunately, there are probably a lot of things that my spirit is wishing for, but I think right now, follow through is a good wish to have.
What is your spirit wishing for?
Amy
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Healthy Eating and Living
I've written a lot about wanting to change my diet and my reasons for doing so. I've also written a lot about my struggles with being healthy. Currently, I am finding it really hard giving up meat. I still want to give up meat and I think in time, I will actually do it. I think my biggest struggle is figuring out a meal plan that my whole family will eat. I am thinking that I probably need to make meat dishes for my kids, and maybe even my husband, and I will just need to have some restraint and follow through with how I want to eat. Given my BRCA2 gene (and don't want to proceed with surgery yet), I think it is also important to reduce the amount of animal protein I eat (at least from what I have read).
At this point, I really need to stop eating gluten, dairy, and reduce animal protein. I also need and want to reduce the amount of added sugar, especially white sugar, in my families diet. I start off doing well and then, I flop and fail. My oldest son is not supposed to be eating dairy and gluten either (we both scored 3's on our IgG blood test) . Given that I have concerns about Michael having more of an issue than just a speech delay, I know that following through on no gluten, no dairy, and probably other additives will help him out tremendously!
At this point, I am really going to concentrate on following through with my healthy living goals. Other than this week, when I have been sick, I have been doing great at exercise. I could probably do more, but I am happy with what I am doing. I need to add some short meditation and yoga in, but otherwise exercise is great. I am trying to make time to be creative, which is going ok, but not perfect. I am also trying to get organized which is extremely slow going and tedious and time consuming, and difficult.
My thoughts here seem a little scattered (I'm obviously not a writer). I really just wanted to get down in words, my goals and what I am finding difficult. I hope that taking time to write down, what I want and what barriers I am facing, even if those barriers are just invisible barriers that I have put up, will help me be more aware and make the changes I need to, even if they are slow going!
Amy
At this point, I really need to stop eating gluten, dairy, and reduce animal protein. I also need and want to reduce the amount of added sugar, especially white sugar, in my families diet. I start off doing well and then, I flop and fail. My oldest son is not supposed to be eating dairy and gluten either (we both scored 3's on our IgG blood test) . Given that I have concerns about Michael having more of an issue than just a speech delay, I know that following through on no gluten, no dairy, and probably other additives will help him out tremendously!
At this point, I am really going to concentrate on following through with my healthy living goals. Other than this week, when I have been sick, I have been doing great at exercise. I could probably do more, but I am happy with what I am doing. I need to add some short meditation and yoga in, but otherwise exercise is great. I am trying to make time to be creative, which is going ok, but not perfect. I am also trying to get organized which is extremely slow going and tedious and time consuming, and difficult.
My thoughts here seem a little scattered (I'm obviously not a writer). I really just wanted to get down in words, my goals and what I am finding difficult. I hope that taking time to write down, what I want and what barriers I am facing, even if those barriers are just invisible barriers that I have put up, will help me be more aware and make the changes I need to, even if they are slow going!
Amy
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