Cancer!

I hate this word!  Like most people, I have been more than touched by cancer within my family.  I also have the breast cancer gene mutation which freaks me out more than just a little.  The decisions I know have to make suck to say the least, but at least I have the options to make decisions (about the only positive that I see in knowing that I have the gene, well along with knowing that my kids are at risk instead of not knowing.

I just found out that someone who I went to high school with lost her husband to pancreatic cancer last night.  As a person with a BRCA2 mutation, I am also at risk for pancreatic cancer, although that risk is low especially in comparison to my breast and ovarian cancer risk.  I also found out that there is more pancreatic cancer in my family that I ever knew.  Granted it is the familial lineage is pretty far away, but at least for me, it scares the crap out of me.

Every time I hear that some has been diagnosed with cancer or passes away from cancer, I get more freaked out.  I know that I need to make certain decisions, really just whether or not I am going to have my ovaries removed or not.  Every time I think I've made the decision, I think and then lose my nerve to stick with it.  Right now I am leaning against surgery and looking more at lifestyle changes.  That may change as I get older, as I get more peri-menopausal, or as life happens.  For me, not having surgery means that I will have the chance to have surgery if I choose at a later date.  If I have surgery when I am not ready, I can never take it back.  I do know that I am putting myself more at risk for ovarian cancer, but for now, that is my decision.  I did get my blood test back for my ovarian cancer test and it was normal, good news, and I have my ultrasound next week.  I still need to schedule my breast MRI, but need to do it at a certain time so I am in a waiting period right now.

After hearing the news of my friends's husband's passing, I really need to stick with my goals.  I really need to focus on eating right, exercising, being creative, and getting my life organized.  Following through with my goals all help me relieve stress on my mind, my body, and my spirit.  Now I just need to keep this resolve and follow through.  As I sit here typing, I am drinking my green shake (after I ate a crappy lunch).  I need to make sure that I actually drink these and eat more fruits and veggies in general as well as good whole grains!

For all that want to know what I put in my shake, this is it:

Green Smoothie

1cups of green leafy veggies (today was swiss chard)
1/2 an apple (green or red)
1/2 a pear
1 banana
1/2 an avocado
1/2 a bag of frozen blackberries
10 oz of water

Blend til smooth and enjoy!  I do have a vita mix.  I'm not sure how it would work in a traditional blender.  I believe that you should have a high speed blender so that it can really get things blended so that your body can incorporate them easily.

Enjoy life and take care of yourself!

Amy

On Being Previvor

If you didn't know, I recently found out that I am a "previvor".    A previvor is a term, I believe, that was founded by force.com to designate a term for people who are positive for the BRCA gene.  I now am faced with the decision to have prophylactic surgeries to remove my ovaries and my breasts.  This has been something that I have thought about for the last couple of months.  I had started thinking about it before I got tested, but the reality of this is just finally hitting me.  Last night was really the first time that I allowed myself to break down.  I was out doing my walk/run and in the middle of it, I broke down and started crying.  I started talking to my husband about what happened and he said I really need to do research and figure out what I need to do for me and that he will support me in what ever decision I make.

If you couldn't tell by the name of this blog, I believe in living a more natural life, but I also believe that there is a balance that needs to happen when living a natural life.  This decision is one area that I believe needs to be balanced.  I don't think that it is an easy decision to make: to either have surgery to remove parts of my body, that for a lot of women including me, are part of who we are as women or to use more alternative means to prevent cancer, breast and ovarian.  Right now I am leaning to not doing surgery with the potential of maybe having my ovaries out, but not having my breasts removed.  I have felt that this was going to be the way that I would go from the beginning, but I am scared of making the wrong decision and getting cancer and leaving my husband and 3 young children before it is time all because I made the wrong decision.

The New Year's goals that I have written about are based a lot on my BRCA2 + status.  I think that if I can work harder on these goals and actually meet them or at least continue working on them, I have a good chance of preventing cancer.  There is a lot of writing out there about having a gene and getting cancer.  There is also some information on how your genes are not your destiny.  I am hoping that I can make changes to my life to help change my genetic destiny.  I need to do a ton of research, and I need to find people who are on the same page as I am.  I haven't really figured out how to find these people, but I am hoping that there may be a group that I can find, maybe a support group type forum that actually meets in person.  I love that the internet allows for all sorts of info, but I really want to meet people and talk to professionals in person.

I am hoping that at some point in my life, I will figure out what I want to do professionally and hope that the less stress I have career wise will help with less stress overall.  I would love to have a career that took into account my beliefs of living a handmade and natural life.

Wish me luck on my research endeavors!
Amy