If you didn't know, I recently found out that I am a "previvor". A previvor is a term, I believe, that was founded by force.com to designate a term for people who are positive for the BRCA gene. I now am faced with the decision to have prophylactic surgeries to remove my ovaries and my breasts. This has been something that I have thought about for the last couple of months. I had started thinking about it before I got tested, but the reality of this is just finally hitting me. Last night was really the first time that I allowed myself to break down. I was out doing my walk/run and in the middle of it, I broke down and started crying. I started talking to my husband about what happened and he said I really need to do research and figure out what I need to do for me and that he will support me in what ever decision I make.
If you couldn't tell by the name of this blog, I believe in living a more natural life, but I also believe that there is a balance that needs to happen when living a natural life. This decision is one area that I believe needs to be balanced. I don't think that it is an easy decision to make: to either have surgery to remove parts of my body, that for a lot of women including me, are part of who we are as women or to use more alternative means to prevent cancer, breast and ovarian. Right now I am leaning to not doing surgery with the potential of maybe having my ovaries out, but not having my breasts removed. I have felt that this was going to be the way that I would go from the beginning, but I am scared of making the wrong decision and getting cancer and leaving my husband and 3 young children before it is time all because I made the wrong decision.
The New Year's goals that I have written about are based a lot on my BRCA2 + status. I think that if I can work harder on these goals and actually meet them or at least continue working on them, I have a good chance of preventing cancer. There is a lot of writing out there about having a gene and getting cancer. There is also some information on how your genes are not your destiny. I am hoping that I can make changes to my life to help change my genetic destiny. I need to do a ton of research, and I need to find people who are on the same page as I am. I haven't really figured out how to find these people, but I am hoping that there may be a group that I can find, maybe a support group type forum that actually meets in person. I love that the internet allows for all sorts of info, but I really want to meet people and talk to professionals in person.
I am hoping that at some point in my life, I will figure out what I want to do professionally and hope that the less stress I have career wise will help with less stress overall. I would love to have a career that took into account my beliefs of living a handmade and natural life.
Wish me luck on my research endeavors!